I don't know how to better describe this day other than a roller coaster ride. There have been so many ups and downs that I am emotionally exhausted and I don't even know how to feel. I went from being sure that I was going to have to tell one hundred people, who have purchased autographed copies, I have no book to give them, to feeling fairly certain this is all actually going to come together by my goal date.

My book "Even If" is going to be released tomorrow. It is scary and exciting and seems nothing less than surreal. Ten years ago I felt compelled to write my story down. For years I wrote for an hour every morning. I knew nothing about how to write a book, so I just started writing down everything I could remember. I thought if nothing else, this might be an interesting read for my kids and my grand babies one day. Funny thing though, the more I wrote the more I learned about myself. I began to sort through years of choices and questioning those choices and wondering why on earth I did the things I did. The more I wrote the more clear things became until at last I decided that I must have been supposed to write this book as a form of therapy to help me get past my past. After losing my son four years ago, in an automobile accident, I also lost my desire to write. I tried a couple of times but just couldn't find the will or the strength to continue my work, so I abandoned it.

About the time COVID hit, I was contacted by a publisher who wanted to read my story. When he told me it was a worthwhile project, I began pouring myself into my book with renewed purpose. With the quarantine in effect, I certainly had the time. I decided, I would be a voice for my son. I would take all of the pain in my life and his and use it for good. The words poured out onto the page and nine months later, here I am a published author. Publishing a book is way harder than you would think but it seems I am finally finished, at least with book one.

My hope is that my story will help others to overcome their circumstances just as I did. You see, for years I hoped for the fairytale ending to my story but year after year nothing got any better. In fact, things got progressively worse until I finally took matters into my own hands and took the needed steps to change my future. Hope without action is merely wishing and you can wish things were different for ever, but nothing will ever change until you do something to change it. Even if you have totally messed things up in your life, you can still take a firm grip on your future and become who you were always meant to be.